Week 2 Kindness Stories: A Kind Word in a Struggling World

 

How many parents reading this feel like they’re failing their children at least once a week? Once a day? Mallory, a mom of 2, believes that a great random act of kindness is taking the time to offer a parent empathy and encouragement. Someone to witness their struggle and tell them what an awesome job they’re doing.

A few weeks ago, Mallory was watching her son’s basketball game and noticed how the coach was trying to balance instructing the team and entertaining her own children. Both children, under 5, were climbing the coach as if she were a tree and asking a spit fire of questions like only preschoolers can. What stood out to Mallory was how this coach didn’t seem to get frustrated but remained “calm, cool, and collected”. At the end of the game Mallory made sure to stop and let the coach know how impressed she was with her parenting skills.

What I find amazing about humans is that we often give to others what we, ourselves, need. We resonate with their struggle and extend the empathy and support that we crave.

My Otherworldly Abilities

 

It was a scary moment when I realized that I could trust someone enough to expose parts of myself that others had judged me for. That I could share things that had made others uncomfortable, and this person would actually support and encourage me in these areas.

For some time, I’ve had some otherworldly abilities that I can’t always explain and for a myriad of reasons I started to hide. They were just one more way to feel weird and unlovable. But I’ve found someone who believes I have these abilities and can do these things and that makes all the difference. We may not come to the same conclusions as to why or how, and honestly the truth is usually a hodge podge of beliefs, but he trusts I am having these experiences.

There are a couple ways these abilities have shown up in my life. I can sense and “communicate” with people who were once alive, like my sister, and sometimes it’s like I can tap into an energy that can’t be seen. This is particularly useful when I want to tap into a greater source of creativity.

I spend so much time feeling uncomfortable and embarrassed by these abilities but really, they are gifts. I want to celebrate them as a useful skill and not something shameful that needs to be kept hidden.

Week 1 Kindness Stories: Small Acts, Big Changes

  (Photograph includes Steph's grandpa and wife.)

 

One of my favourite people is Steph and I’ve been lucky enough to call her my friend for almost 30 years. She is the epitome of kindness so it’s no surprise that her acts of kindness story was the first one I received.

In the 1960’s, Steph’s grandpa was a school janitor in Vancouver. While cleaning the hallways during lunch he started to notice that some children would throw out sandwiches and fruit they didn’t want and then at the end of the day another child would come along and dig them out of the garbage. He soon found out that this child's family didn't have enough money to provide him with lunches.

This thoughtful man was quite poor himself, with a low paying job and 4 kids to feed. He knew what it meant to struggle and wanted to help where he could. He decided that when he saw a child about to throw out food, he’d tell them to put it on a windowsill instead. This meant the hungry child could come pick what they wanted without having to hunt through the garbage.

Over time, like many small acts of kindness, this grew into something much larger. These sandwiches and fruit left on a windowsill inspired the school to adopt its first lunch program. When we can use our own struggles to create empathy and change, that’s a beautiful thing.

Your Stories of Kindness

I don’t know about you, but I’ve been feeling hopeless because of all the challenges we’re facing at the moment. I’ve had this desire to make some grand contribution to create a kinder and more joyful world but all that does is overwhelm me and then I shut down. So, I've decided to try a smaller, more achievable goal. Each week, for 10 weeks, I’m going to share a story about kindness. I believe the world needs to be reminded of and inspired by the random acts of kindness that exist around us each and every day.

 This is where I need YOUR help.

 Do you have any random acts of kindness stories to share? It could be as simple as you giving someone a compliment or picking up trash on your favourite trail. Maybe a stranger bought you a coffee at Starbucks or helped you carry groceries to your car. It’s not the size of the act that’s important, it’s the care put into it.

Please DM or email me your story at brandinixon@hotmail.com.  It can remain anonymous if you like. 

"Your Body, My Choice"

      I mean how can….like who could…why would…this is bonkers!

    Rarely am I at a loss for words but when I first saw this trending slogan, I was unable to grab the nouns and verbs swirling through my brain and settle them into a coherent sentence. But time has passed and now I have a lot of words. Angry, disillusioned, exhausted, ashamed, and disgusted to name just a few. I pride myself in being someone who tries to understand all points of view, but I couldn’t give a flying f*ck what your side is if you declare that you have ownership over my body and choices. Honestly, I don’t even think you have a side. I think you’re just a bitter bastard.

    I grew up in an environment where men were constantly being blamed for trying to control women. I thought this was just an overreaction to unhealthy relationships but maybe I was wrong. There are actually men out there that really, truly, want to control women right down to their ovaries and uterus. And now I can’t unknow this.

    Sadly, at least for now, it colors the way I see men. I know that’s not fair and that these bitter men don’t represent most men but when something hits you so hard that it shakes your belief in the goodness of people this is the outcome. Honestly, with woman’s reproductive rights on the chopping block in the States (and our political leanings are moving closer that way in Canada) fairness is no longer part of the conversation. Now it’s about self-preservation.

    Don't kid yourselves. This slogan isn’t just an absurd trend; this is a movement. And it’s terrifying.

                

                

 

When Success Becomes Scarier Than Failure

I’m finding that fear is starting to paralyze me as I get closer to moving cities and trying to pursue a more creative career. Underneath the fear is a spark of excitement but it’s like trying to find a single flame in a forest fire.

    My main fear in life thus far has been failure. And I really have failed at reaching most of my life goals. It wasn’t my abilities or determination that screwed it up but the inevitable moment when my bipolar symptoms took over and my life either slowed down or stopped entirely. After a few (dozen) crashes I would eventually have to admit that whatever goal I was chasing had been too stressful or intense. My mind can be a fickle bitch.

    However, fear of success is now fanning the forest fire. If failing before I even reached my goals was devastating, imagine the pain of reaching my goals and then being swallowed up into a bipolar nightmare. The fall would be so much more devastating and harder to recover from. I know I can recover from failure because I’ve done it plenty of times but crashing after success, I’m not so sure.

     I feel like I’m moving towards a life where I could spend more time actually feeling fulfilled and happy and less time anxious and angry. Living in a place that feels more like home and following dreams that bring me joy. I don’t know what will happen in the coming months and years of this new life I’m trying to create but at least I’m now scared of success instead of failure. That’s a win, right?